Shocker on Capitol Hill

| In a stunning reversal, Mitch McConnell and John Boehner announced today at a joint press conference that they will do everything they can to protect Obamacare. The minority leaders of the Senate and House respectively denounced efforts to repeal recently-passed healthcare and decried the lawsuits launched by several state attorneys general to declare the new law unconstitutional.

"They are moving forward against the will of the American people," thundered Boehner. "Shame on them!"
"We will not budge on core Republican principles," said McConnell. "We will protect Medicare and we will protect Obamacare."

McConnell and Boehner were sent scurrying to the microphones by a surprise announcement from the White House that President Obama was making an unprecedented offer of bipartisanship by joining Republicans in their campaign to "Repeal and Replace" healthcare reform.


Obama said he had been swayed by a statement issued by Michelle Bachman (R-MN) saying, "It's future generations, our children and grandchildren who will pay the price for our government's arrogance and recklessness, and the American people won't ever forget the irresponsible actions of this Administration and Democratic Majority. After all, government answers to the people, not the other way around. I'm asking my colleagues to join me in repealing this monstrosity of a bill" (

Gary Markstein

An official close to Obama, asked to explain the president's sudden turnaround, explained that, since the Republicans automatically oppose anything Obama is for, the easiest way for Obama to protect his victory was to be against it after he was for it. The official, who spoke on condition of anonymity because he/she/it is not authorized to speak to media, described it as a simple case of applied reverse psychology.




Hey, it could happen! After all, the party of "Drill, baby, drill" immediately condemned Obama's announcement that he would approve an expansion of off-shore drilling for oil, just the latest in a string of against-it-after-they-were-for-it flip-flops by the GOP.

On a related note, the office of Senator John Kerry (D-MA) issued a statement denying that the senator was working as a PR consultant to the Republicans.

April fool!

Last updated on Apr 13, 2018



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