Night mystery


How does this happen?

A strange phenomenon occurs in my bedroom at night, one without rational explanation. And frankly, it's giving me the heebie-jeebies.

Like most people, I position my mattress directly on top of the box spring. I'm not obsessively precise about it, but I'm sure that my mattress positioning practices do not deviate in any statistically significant way from the norm.

Now here's the mystery: When I wake up in the morning, I often find that my mattress has shifted to one side so it overhangs the box spring. And here's what especially odd: First, it doesn't just shift willy-nilly, at an angle or just one corner. It shifts evenly. Second, it always shifts to the same side, never the other way. And if I don't put it back, after a couple of nights, the mattress ends up sticking out six inches or more beyond the side of the box spring.


It occurred to me that since I live so very close to where the mountains begin to rise up from the valley floor (2 blocks), and since the mattress always slips to the side of the bed away from the mountains, perhaps there had been a subtle shifting of tectonic plates putting my house on a slant.


I brought out my level to test the hypothesis. It is true that half-way between the head and the foot of the mattress one side is just a tad higher than the other, but I attribute that to the fact that I tend to sleep in the same position night after night and don't turn my mattress as often as my momma told me I should. Closer to the foot of the bed, the mattress is spot-on level.

It boggles the mind! Do I shift the mattress while walking in my sleep? Does Wanda emit some sort of powerful force-field from her bedroom on the other side of the wall? It just seems that it would take a lot of exertion to move the mattress while lying on it, and that it would be hard to do so without waking up.

I know what you're thinking. It's not that. Lord, I wish it were that.

Perhaps it's poltergeists. Or the spirit of Tahquitz.