March?

California poppies

How did this happen?

The earth must have gone all wobbly on its axis. This are happening all out of sequence.

leap-day

Yesterday was Leap Day, the calendar hack that keeps the equinox happening about the time that we think it should. But it was also Oscar Day, the annual ritual of self-congratulation and ostentatious display by the film industry. These are not supposed to happen on the same day!

Punxsutawney Phil

And what about Groundhog Day? I don't remember Punxsutawney Phil making his annual prognostication about the duration of winter weather. The din of the Iowa caucus cacophany has hardly subsided, for crying out loud!

The Oscars. Speaking of crying out loud, how is it that an industry capable of producing such magic on the big screen is so bad at producing the awards show? The inane repartee and wooden delivery of the presenters does no credit to the industry.

In my humble opinion, the best part of the whole show was Tiger Woods' American Express commercial. OK, Billy Crystal's quips about thank-yous for every resident of New Zealand were chuckleworthy.

And I'm sure all America rested easier in their Barcaloungers knowing that no wardrobe malfunctions or naughty words would make their way across the airwaves, thanks to the fickle finger of a censor poised over the bleep button.